A friend emailed me this stored procedure about marriage, and the bride answers with DROP HIM. Pure SQL humor, for fun only, never for a real server.
Which SQL Server Client Driver to Use Now
Choose a SQL Server client driver by application stack: ODBC, current OLE DB, Microsoft.Data.SqlClient, or JDBC, then test security defaults.
SQL SERVER – 2005 Limiting Result Sets by Using TABLESAMPLE – Examples
TABLESAMPLE returns a random sample of rows by percent or row count. My examples show why the same query returns a different number of rows each time.
SQL SERVER – 2005 Replace TEXT with VARCHAR(MAX) – Stop using TEXT, NTEXT, IMAGE Data Types
Is VARCHAR(MAX) big enough to hold TEXT? Yes. TEXT, NTEXT and IMAGE will be deprecated, so replace TEXT with VARCHAR(MAX) and use the new MAX data types.
SQL SERVER – 2005 Find Table without Clustered Index – Find Table with no Primary Key
A query on sys.indexes to find every table without clustered index in a database, why heaps can slow you down, and how to pick a clustered key.
SQL SERVER – Change Default Fill Factor For Index
The Default Fill Factor in SQL Server is 0. Change it with sp_configure to leave free space on index pages and reduce page splits. I like mine at 90.
SQL SERVER – Stored Procedure to display code (text) of Stored Procedure, Trigger, View or Object
Need to display code of a stored procedure, trigger, view or function? The system stored procedure sp_helptext prints the text of any unencrypted object.